My dog is a Diva. I've changed names to protect the innocent

Scout

I've changed names to protect the innocent.

Scout is a finicky eater.

He will eat  about 1/3 of scoop of dry kibble twice a day.

Add in one of the Stella and Chewy patties twice a day (or one and a half)

Crumble up /break in quarters and mix in.

I'm fine if Baron and Milan eat some of his treats.

I think Milan is on a "diet" (I don’t ask these things, diets are hot topics) - but she's sneaky

I also packed the rubber maid containers as his bowls because if he doesn't finish it, you can top it off with a lid and save for later during dinner time- I leave food out all day for him at home /but if Milan is visiting - we have to put up - she will eat what he doesn't finish.

She runs to his bowl (after she greets me of course, because I’m a delight), but skips over the rest of the household straight to bowl to gobble up his leftovers because I’ve spoiled him beyond the point of recognition.

I probably should pay you more. I know Scout is a lot of a lot. He will scoff. Cut his eyes and you and if you “get ready” to go anywhere in front of him, he will judge you. It doesn’t matter how great the fit is, Scout is the Tim Gunn of our household.

And we are all just on America’s next top model.

Treats whenever. But Good luck with Milan around. She may act cute and docile but when it comes to treats, She’s not playing around.

Again, he can eat as much as he wants - he's  picky and will be anxious and not eat a lot.

Scout probably could use his own therapy dog. He’s complex. He will bark at 3 legged dogs with venom but will run and hide behind me when there is real and present danger.

I packed a little sedative in his little cosmetic bag labeled scout - if he gets super anxious (fireworks or bad thunderstorms) give him half tab of the good good.

You have to trick him. If he even sees you reach for his cosmetic bag, he will run, even though he knows it makes the thunder softer and less invasive to his giant ear magnets.

Last night, I had to give him a bath, he heard me say bath and ran into my daughter’s room, hid behind her arsenal of stuff animals. One of her stuffed animals is a GIANT shrimp, named Jeremy. Sorry Jer, but Scout’s smelly and I’m already being undercharged for this whole process.

Back to the good good. Place the good good, In a piece of cheese or..

Sometimes (ok you know I’m lying ..most of the some of the all of the time) I have to put in back of his throat and soothe his neck until he swallows. {Rub his white tuxedo fur under his throat). He will scoff and stare at you but He will allow you to do that.

It’s like he knows he needs to be sedated but he also wants me to know that he knows that he’s anxious but that

……IS JUST WHO HE IS and why can’t you just ACCEPT ME for all of my Tim Gunneyness plus the absolute irrational anxiety.

HE WILL TRY TO DIG. Anything. During storms and fireworks. So I pull a suitcase out and toss his blanket in there and somehow him feeling like he dug out a suitcase to dig into, settles him.

But - just when you think you are not being judged, because he’s sedated ..he will continue to cut his eyes at you-letting you know - who is really in control.

Oh.

He's pretty good on lead.

Thanks so much .